Are you wondering how to make friends as a solo traveler? Well, you’re in the right place. When I tell people that I left home at 18 to travel the world alone, the most common response is ‘Weren’t you terrified!?’. And the answer is actually no, I wasn’t.
But there was one thing that scared the LIFE out of me, and it wasn’t kidnapping or being robbed or being on my own… it was not making friends.
In reality, making friends as a young solo traveler is a lot easier than I expected. Those who solo travel are usually pretty keen to meet new people and at least half of them are freaking out about the exact same thing as you right now.
That being said, there are absolutely ways to do it and ways not to do it, which I realized pretty fast. So in this post, I’ve created a little guide on how to make friends as a solo traveler to hopefully, if nothing else, alleviate your fears.
Hostel dorms are the key
Many travelers have very polarized opinions on staying in hostel dorms. But when it comes to cost, fun, and most importantly, making friends, they always come out on top.
To put it simply; When I spent a month in Indonesia, I think I spent ONE day completely on my own. Whereas, in The Netherlands, I stayed alone in an apartment. And I think I went TWO WEEKS without talking to somebody my age.
It’s fair to say I loved every single second I spent in Indonesia and had a very depressing stay in Amsterdam.
When you are staying in a hostel, it’s pretty much a guarantee you’ll make friends even if you don’t participate in hostel activities. But that being said, attending hostel group activities is such a good way to meet new people.
Often hostels host dinners, outdoor activities, and parties where everyone from your hostel comes to hang out! And even if you’re anxious about being thrown into the deep end, I can promise a whole lot of people there are feeling the same thing, even if they seem insanely confident.
Note: Traveling alone for the first time? Read my post ‘31 Tips for Flying Alone for the First Time‘.
(Side note for teen travelers)
As an 18-year-old, most people around me were older than me. The majority of people I met were between 25 and 30, with a few exceptions. My closest friends who I travelled with for a total of 4 weeks, were 25, 26, 27, and 28.
The fact is, you’re in a minority age category, and that can be scary. But I’ll take a bet and say if you’re traveling alone at 18 or 19 you’ll fit in nonetheless.
Usually, people are more surprised about your maturity than anything else, and nobody will choose NOT to be your friend due to your age.
Start up Conversations
Starting up a conversation is one of the best ways to make friends as a solo traveler! I traveled in two groups during my time in South East Asia.
The first started at the common table as I signed into my first hostel, just a simple ‘Hey! Where are you guys from!”.
The second literally started when a girl asked me where the bathroom was. We clicked pretty much instantly and she introduced me to her friends (who also ended up being some of the most amazing people I met on my trip)!
The point is, I never would’ve made such amazing lifelong friends if I hadn’t started and followed through with conversations. Simply saying ‘Hi! My name is ____’ is enough to kickstart a conversation with someone new.
My favorite conversation points to make friends and plans:
- “Where are you from?” followed by (if it’s true): “Oh my gosh I loved it there/I’ve always wanted to go””
- “How long have you stayed here?”, or “Where were you before you came here? Where are you going next?”.
- “Do you have any plans today or tomorrow?” (usually, people are really open with their plans and invite you along!)
- “I’d love to do ____ while I’m here”
- “How long are you traveling for?” and “What’s your favorite place you’ve been?”
But keep in mind, the best way to make friends is to just be authentically yourself. People can tell if you’re being forced. Great conversations are the ones where you’re genuinely interested in what the other person has to say and ask questions because you want to know!
Invite Other People to Join Your Plans
This might just be my favorite way to make friends and one that most people don’t talk about. Make your plans, and instead of waiting for someone else to invite you out, invite them!
Instead of being the ‘new person trying to make friends”, be the person making friends with new people. By taking initiative you’ll be helping yourself, AND helping the people who felt exactly how you did.
It can be scary to be the organizer, walking around the hostel saying “Hey! I’m asking around to get people on board for a big dinner/ beach day/ trip to X. Are you guys around?” IS scary.
But I bet you it’s what a lot of people secretly want someone to do, and don’t feel confident enough to do themselves.
Be You!
The people I met who I clicked with were unapologetically weird, excitable, and loving. They were people who cared, who were completely and passionately themselves or trying to be.
People who were not just surface level, who didn’t care about being perceived as ‘normal’ (or would do anything to NOT be).
So BE YOURSELF, try to stop worrying so much about how you’re perceived. There may be people who aren’t drawn to that, but those people aren’t the people you’re looking for.
The ones who will alter your life and your travels will be the people who like you for you.
Don’t Stress, People Always Come Around
On my first day in Gili Trawangan, Indonesia, I was so lonely (read how to beat travel loneliness HERE!). Until my second afternoon when a girl asked me where the hostel bathroom was.
We started chatting and she introduced me to her group. 3 of whom I ended up traveling with and CLIMBING A MOUNTAIN within the next two weeks.
I even went to stay with one of them in the UK, and we still talk regularly!
I was so stressed that I wouldn’t make any friends and I’d spend the next week alone, but it couldn’t have turned out any different. Just put yourself out there and give it time!
How To Make Friends as a Solo Traveler
The fact that you’re even reading this now shows that you’ll have no trouble making friends. The fact that you care and you’re trying is all the proof you need to know that it’ll be okay.
So don’t stress yourself with the prospect! Enjoy your travels and the people you should be meeting will come your way.
(If you do find yourself getting lonely while solo traveling, make sure to check out my guide on beating travel loneliness: HERE)
